IMG_0001From a mom:(She gave me permission to share and I have edited out personal information)
Well I just have trouble keeping the kids doing what they need to be doing and doing it right so I don’t have to fuss all the time. Every morning when I get up the house is a mess once again. I have to take my time all day just cleaning so my deep cleaning hardly ever gets done. I don’t know. It’s me to I guess. I am just standing at a point always in my pj’s, just cleaning and baby sitting and it just gets frustrating. I feel overwhelmed every day. Nothing ever stays clean ever. I am not so organized either so I know that for the most part it’s my fault as well. I don’t know I’m just having a lot of troubles
myself I just clean or take care of the babies. There’s never time for me. Maybe I should’t feel that way but my hubby doesn’t help at all. He comes home and is glued to the couch and that is it. He should be able to come home and do that but not when I am just overwhelmed with it all and don’t know where to turn.

From Mary:
I can understand how you feel because I was there 34 years ago. I was pregnant with my second baby and felt like I was running in sand. Your husband probably feels like he has his job and you have yours. A dad is not a babysitter, he’s a dad and spending time with the children is a privilege and responsibility. This is hard to get across and we lead first of all by example.
We can involve even babies in our work–sorting laundry, moving things from the washer to the dryer, picking up. Yes it might be faster to do it by yourself but by having them help you, you teach them, you keep them busy and you spend time with them. You can make it fun.
You must get up ahead of the family and take a few minutes to get yourself cleaned up and ready to face the day. A quick devotional to get your mind focused on God’s plan for your life as a wife and a mom and the difference you can make as God’s agent in your husband’s and children’s lives makes a difference. Find some prayer buddies and
friends to get together with for play time. I had a great friend when my children were small. We would get an inexpensive grocery store pizza to share and visit while our children played. There’s also great groups like MOPS and Apples of Gold that have meetings to help moms get out of the house, connect with other moms and learn things
that will help you feel better about what you are accomplishing as a mom.
You are not just a care taker–you are building people to make this a better world. Could you find time to get yourself cleaned up, make your bed, and straighten the kitchen? Could you get a load of laundry going? When I go to my daughter’s house I go through and collect the laundry, do a quick sort and get the laundry going. Then
I go back through the house and get all the dirty dishes and get them into the dishwasher and get that started. Then I take a trash bag and go through and collect all the trash and take it out. That goes a long way toward making the house presentable.
I make sure I decide by 10 am what I am having for dinner. Give your husband a few minutes to decompress after he come home. He probably does more than you think during the day. Then ask for his help nicely with different things like giving the kid’s a bath. Talk to him nicely about some projects around the house you’d like to do that you would need his help with (Like moving stuff cause he is stronger than you or putting stuff up because he is stronger and taller than you.) Women want love
and affection. Men usually want respect and appreciation. Take it a little at a time and when things don’t go the way you plan (almost always) pick yourself up and start again. Jeremiah 29:11 says “I know the plans I have for you,says the LORD, plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” God has a plan for you and
it is better than yours and you have a future and a hope I’ve been there. I could have sent your email if there had been email back then and I’d known of someone to send it to. You can change things a little at a time. The only way you fail is if you quit.

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